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A case of the Icks

The 'Icks' is that moment when you are on a first date with a guy and he does/says/wears something which makes you a tiny bit sick in your mouth. It is not a scientific term but I think it describes the moment perfectly.

We have all been there, you met a seemingly nice guy and decided to go for some drinks, it is all going so well and then he sneezes in your face or talks about himself in the third person. You feel that glass of pinot grigio start to creep back up your throat and you look around for your nearest point of escape. Those are the 'Icks.'

Of course the 'Icks' are not the same for everyone, it is horses for courses after all but let me tell you the story of one of the first dates that I ever went on. Back then at the tender age of 18, (yes I was a late starter) I didn't understand this whole dating malarkey and was painfully polite to everyone even if they didn't deserve it. 

Before I start, I see this as a coming of age date that taught me to be the woman that I am today. Without this painfully awful and 'Ick' filled story I would still be going out with guys that did not deserve the time of day.

So, I had met him at a club and we decided to go for a couple of drinks the following week. He seemed quite normal and I was rather excited. I put on my pretty dress and asked where he wanted to meet, he suggested O'Neils; the old man pub where everything is served in pint form. Although this was the first 'Ick' moment I politely obliged.

When I turned up he was wearing a football shirt and reading a science fiction novel (2nd 'Ick' point) but he offered to get me a drink so I smiled nicely. During our conversation he decided to tell me that he ate a live goldfish once, (3rd 'Ick' point) he then proceeded to tell me that he was sick of girls that expect to be treated like princesses and think guys should do everything for them. He proclaimed that if I was lucky enough to go out with him then I shouldn't expect that at all (4th 'Ick' point.)

And it doesn't finish there, he then told me it was my round because he only takes five pounds out on dates with him so the girl has to pay the rest (can't even count how many 'Ick' points that is now.) Next he pointed at the freckles on my arms and said 'God you have a lot of those, it's not that I dislike them....' and the final blow was that he jumped in my taxi home, asked the driver to take the long route back to my house so we could drop him off and then didn't offer any money towards it (of course he only had a fiver though!)

He then asked if I would like to see him again, my Ickometer by that time had blown up and I shut the taxi door in his face and told the driver to step on it. Needless to say that after that trauma I am more selective about who I date, however you can never be sure how someone is going to turn out. Sometimes they just slip through the net so listen to your gut, if you have an 'Ick' moment he probably isn't going to be right for you.

Here are a couple more moments which happened even after I had learnt my lesson:

• The guy who refused to talk to me for the first 15 minutes when we met up because he was digesting his food???
• The guy who told me he kicked pigeons
• The guy who called me Babbie after 1 date
• The guy who invited me to a wedding in Africa after 1 date
• The guy with the intense eye contact who kept moving closer as I backed away
• The white middle class guy who thought he was gangster (you can't be gangster if you live with your parents. FACT!)

Tweet me @abbiecoles and share your 'Ick' moments.

The Game: Who is keeping score anyway?

I have decided to tackle the frankly confusing topic of men and relationships because of a recent resolution that I made; yes I have decided to stay single for a year. This may sound rather dramatic and perhaps a tad peculiar but I have my reasons. 
I am not going to start man bashing, this isn't 'Loose Women' and to be honest I have never been in a bad relationship it has usually just been a case of timing. So I have come to this decision based on the fact that I have not been properly single for around 5 years. A lot has changed in these years and I feel having just graduated that perhaps it is time to focus on my life rather than how I fit into someone elses. 
It may sound a bit selfish but I think that in your early twenties with no responsibilities is the perfect time to be selfish. 
I'm not adverse to the idea of dating over the year, I'm just not into the whole serious boyfriend/girlfriend thing. Personally I am more in the hanging out and having a laugh stage so the resolution is my way of not letting myself slip into something I am not ready for. Of course it is different for everyone, some of my best friends are in fantastic relationships and I couldn't be happier for them but I am just not at that point yet.
Men is a topic that comes up time and time again when talking with my friends, in fact I have just received a message from one asking how long they should leave before texting a guy back. The problem is the 'Rules', the unspoken law of meeting someone new. Of course you can't tell someone if you like them, don't be absurd, instead you must trick them into telling you how they feel first. God forbid that someone finds out that you fancy them, nope it is much more sensible to pretend you don't care. Where does it end though? Surely it would be a lot simpler if we actually said what we were thinking rather than orchestrating this extreme facade.
See I never really got the whole 'Game' thing, if I like a guy I will tell him because life is short, much too short to wonder why he only left one kiss at the end of his text instead of the usual two or why he is wearing that jumper that his ex gave him. A lot of the frustration that girls feel is the fact that they don't know where they stand,well if you ask directly then there is only one of two answers and it takes a lot less time. 
I may revisit this subject in the future but for now this is my two cents.

Any comments or questions, tweet me @abbiecoles

Facebook: Like or Unfriend?

Let me start by sharing with you the things that I was blissfully unaware of until Facebook exploded onto our computer screens in 2004.
1. I have a double chin when I laugh.
2. That perfect Saturday night outfit that I spent a lot of money on looked truly terrible from the back.
3. A fringe does not suit me, NEVER do it again.
4. All of my Facebook friends have a perfect job, perfect relationship and perfect life in general.

Pre 2004 I was happily ignorant to all of the above and managed to live a fulfilling and carefree existence but that has all changed thanks to Facebook. I am not proclaiming that it is the devil or that everyone should revolt and delete their accounts but perhaps a short spell in social networking rehab is in order, especially for those who find themselves fixated by what someone is eating for dinner or what their friend thinks of the new episode of Gossip Girl.

Personally I decided it was time for a reality check when I was scrolling through status updates upon status updates that bored me senseless, in real life would you really 'like' it if your friend called you to tell you they were eating Pringles.......no and why is that? Because it is mind numbingly boring. So why bother typing it?

Started as a means of reconnecting with friends and socialising, Facebook is becoming strangely unsocial. The number of people who write on their friend's wall rather than walk 10 metres and tell them face to face is growing. I refuse to believe this is due to laziness, rather I think this is for another reason which is so other people will see it. Therefore reiterating the fact that you have friends, you are social and having oh so much fun.

See the problem with Facebook is that it is like an airbrushed version of your life. Posts and photos are carefully chosen to one up your friends developing a narcissistic tinge to everyday life. Would you really tell everyone about that Friday night you stayed in wearing 8 year old pyjamas, eating whatever was in the freezer, watching Bridget Jones Diary and praying to God that you don't end up like her..........I feel I have said too much. Well chances are no you wouldn't but when you get that amazing promotion at work or get asked out by that hunky guy from the coffee shop many of us are already updating our status before he has had a chance to walk away.

We are also becoming inundated with photographs, every part of our lives must be documented and shown to the world. Since when did it become normal to photograph your food before you eat it because I don't know about you but I definitely did not sign up for that. Every teenager and twenty something is obsessed with getting that perfect profile picture that says I am the life and soul of the party and you are lucky to know me. Nights out become a marathon of flashes and pouting instead of actually, you know, enjoying yourself.

The thing no one talks about though is how this actually makes others feel, surrounded by people constantly telling you how amazing their life is it can be overwhelming when yours isn't quite the fairy tale you envisaged. That is why everything you see on Facebook has to be taken with a pinch of salt, nobody has the perfect life and if they were uncontrollably happy all the time would they really feel the need to tell everybody on a social networking site? 

Are we all trying so hard to give the impression that we are having fun and leading amazing lives that we forget to actually live in the real world? I have to say since laying off the Facebook it has been like escaping the Matrix, colours are brighter, sounds are clearer and I feel at one with the Earth...okay that is a bit melodramatic but why not give it a try. Life is a lot more fun when you aren't comparing yourself to others and seriously do you actually care that 'Norman is stuck in traffic.' Nope, me either.

Apologies

First of all let me apologise for the extremely delayed post, since my last entry I have finished university completely so that is sort of my excuse........no I'm not buying it either. So with much excitement and anticipation (perhaps) I present: 

FACEBOOK: LIKE OR UNFRIEND?

Hope you enjoy, tweet me @abbiecoles

British summertime

The summer has finally decided to arrive in the British Isles, making us emerge blinking into the scorching sunlight. It is practically tropical in my neck of the woods which means one thing.....time to get the summer clothes on.  It has been a struggle for us Brits this year, the weather has not been kind to us and we longed for our favourite summer past times; sitting in a pub garden and burning. For all the readers not from the U.K there are a few things you should know about us:

1. We spend all year looking forward to the inevitable week of warm weather we get every year.
2. From June-August we WILL wear our summer clothes no matter what temperature it is and we WILL enjoy it. Sandals are an appropriate foot wear choice even if it is raining, as long as it is summer; we aren't idiots!
3. Even if it is blooming freezing we will still sit outside and as our lips turn blue we will rejoice in the glimpses of sunshine.
4. As soon as the sun hints at coming out there is a secret race to see who can have a BBQ first. If you win you can gloat knowing that you beat all the neighbours that you never talk to.
5. No matter what temperature it is, the sea will always be freezing but it won't stop us. Convulsions and chattering teeth are the sign of a great time.
6. We will always burn because we don't believe in using sun cream in our own country, that is for abroad. We can handle our own sun thank you very much.

Well I have done 3 out of the 6 since the sun started shining (2 days ago) so I better crack on with the other 3.

How to get an internship at Glamour Magazine

I apologise if you think that the title is quite misleading seen as I didn't manage to secure an elusive internship at Glamour; the UK's No.1 women's magazine. However, this post is my guide on what not to do when going for an interview at one of your favourite magazines. How do I know this? Well because this is what I did that morning in June when I arrived in London.
I felt it was important to show you my awkward tendencies in the previous post ('Is awkward the new cool?') so you would better understand the type of person that I am before relaying this cringe worthy tale into the blogger-sphere. So here it goes; my rules on What NOT to do at a Glamour Magazine internship interview.

DO NOT wander up and down Old Bond Street continuously for half an hour trying to find the offices. There are a lot of expensive shops there, like Alexander McQueen and Prada, they may think you are casing the joint.

DO NOT forget to read the door numbers. It is not meant to be a challenge to find the front door, it isn't Platform 9 and three quarters. If it is number 3 it will probably be the doorway between 2 and 4.

DO NOT decide to put the finishing touches to your outfit and make up in the park opposite, you will probably end up with dirt or twigs on your person and it will earn you some rather worrying glances.

DO NOT perspire excessively. This can result it what I call the 'reverse mustache' (patent pending) where you sweat the fake tan off above your top lip resulting in it being deathly pale compared to the rest of your skin. Not a good look.

DO NOT make up words because you are nervous. Wroted is not a word, you know that. So try and use English when speaking, this will probably work in your favour.

DO NOT forget to show off the fashion magazine that you produced. It is quite important and unless your interviewer possesses the power of X ray vision, they will not be able to see it if it is in your bag.

DO NOT get stuck in the lift doors in front of your interviewer. Your clumsiness is on a need to know basis and if by any chance this does happen to you definitely...

DO NOT shout 'BALLS!'

DO tell your best friends about the interview afterwards. Life is tough they could probably do with a laugh!

Is awkward the new cool?

Awkward. Even the word sounds....well awkward. I definitely fall into this category both physically and socially and there has never been a better time to proclaim your awkwardness to the world. The pin up girl for the movement; Zooey Deschanel has put it firmly on the map with 'New Girl' featuring the socially challenged; Jess Day. It means we no longer have to hide away for fear of people stumbling across our well hidden awkwardness, we can show it off with pride.

So how am I awkward? I am 5 foot 11 and have incredibly long arms and legs that I can not control effectively. A flick through my facebook photos will provide you with all the evidence you need. As a tall girl I have mastered the knee bend, 'gravity is stronger' on my body than everyone else to stop me looming over my perfectly petite friends. Many a time I have stood there (awkwardly of course) as my friends get chatted up in nightclubs and bars whilst guys pretend that I am not there, like I am a tall shrub in the background, what gentlemen! Oh and the guys that do approach me are are usually 5 foot nothing (why is this?)

Now you may think I am complaining about nothing which admittedly is true but with my tall stature comes clumsiness. Routinely I walk into things, fall over, trip over my own feet and knock things over. I even managed to knock myself out on a sink whilst flicking my hair once.

When you mix this with my social awkwardness then that really is a winning combination. I count this as saying inappropriate things, perhaps breaking into song when you REALLY shouldn't or just generally making a laughing stock of yourself.

For example, once I had a lovely new top that said 'Salut' (hi in French) across the front of it. On my way to work I threw on my cross the body bag and walked through town ignoring the strange looks I was receiving. Can you see where I am going with this? As I walked into work it was pointed out to me that  the 'a' on my top was covered by the strap of my bag.....embarrassing yes but not the end of the world.

Personally I think we should embrace our inner awkwardness because it makes us all different, unique and quirky. I used to long to be like those girls with an unflappable exterior, dressed impeccably and gliding around the room enchanting everyone in their path. Being that perfect sounds like a lot of effort to be honest so instead I say let your freak flag fly and make fun of yourself often!

Well if it works for Zooey.....being cool is over rated anyway!

To prove my point, here are some snaps from my most recent family holiday.......awkward!

Hello World!!

Finishing university is a bizarre time in your life isn't it? I liken time at university to toddlers who have just learnt to walk but have reigns on to stop them wandering too far. A strange analogy but stay with me, when you are at university you play the role of an adult but you aren't quite there yet. You pretend to be an adult but your parents are always there in the background to pick you up when you inevitably fall over, whether it be financially, academically or emotionally.

When you finish and move back home because a student loan doesn't really stretch that far it is a weird transitional time. If like me you have chosen a career that is extremely difficult to get your foot in the door, then moving back home is your only choice. Interning is far from cheap but it is one of the only ways to enter the journalism industry (post on that to come).

I have to admit that part of me did think that I would just walk into my perfect career as soon as I left university, naive I know. Although some of my friends have which is fantastic, for the rest of us we have to work that little bit harder and readjust the life plan a little.

So the phone still isn't ringing off the hook with the editors of my favourite magazines begging me to join their team but it has allowed me to realise a few things. To all the recent university graduates; we are still young, why settle? Take this chance whilst you are still responsibility free to try everything, travel around the world and see everything you have ever wanted to because when you get that dream 9-5 (which you will) you may not have the opportunity to. There will still be jobs when you decide to fully enter the world of work and that time in Peru or Australia could actually help land that job in the long run.

Well that time you got smashed at a full moon party in Thailand will probably not scream management material to potential employers so maybe keep that on a need to know basis, but the experiences we go through make us who we are.

What I am trying to say in my usual long winded way is that perhaps not getting that dream job straight away isn't a bad thing. Don't lose too many sleepless nights over it because worrying won't make it better, now you have the time to do all the things you ever wanted to or gave up on in the past.

Every cloud has a silver lining and if you are lying on the beach in Cuba then that lining starts to look a whole lot shinier.

First stop for me: climbing Mount Kilimanjaro. Oh and joining an acting class! Actually the list is endless but that is a start.

Pretty Perfect

Programmes such as 'Snog, Marry Avoid' have brought natural beauty to the forefront and for that I salute them. I mean there must be something in this fresh faced approach to make up, after all it is meant to accentuate your assets not hide them which is something we should be doing more of in my opinion.

Our very own English rose; Emma Watson says that she often leaves the house having applied only moisturiser. Well that's all very well and good if you have flawless skin and beautifully sculpted cheekbones but what about the rest of us? We have to work a bit harder to achieve that 'I just woke up looking this beautiful' look.

As a make up junkie I am guilty of having perhaps piled it on in the past. When you look back at photos and realise that your face is a completely different colour to your neck, that is when you know you should put down the bronzer.

Now I'm not saying that we should relinquish the fake tan and throw out the fake lashes but perhaps just tone it down a bit. There is nothing wrong with a bit of fakery now and then, having just dyed my mousey brown hair to crimson red I can vouch that it is not a bad thing to fake it sometimes.

So here is my take on natural beauty, again with the beautiful Albana.

Lets start with skin, a great complexion is the key to this look. If like me you struggle with your skin I have two tips for you. The first is drink your eight glasses of water a day, it really does work and you will notice the difference, guaranteed! The second is Sudocrem; yes it is primarily for nappy rash but if you read the small print it is for acne as well, it is my secret weapon for fighting spots.

Also I have swapped a heavy foundation for Maybelline's BB cream which has helped my skin dramatically. After applying, set with a translucent powder to keep it in place all day. Next use a highlighter dabbed underneath the arch of your eyebrow and on your cheekbones to give a beautiful glow.

A pinky blush on the apples of your cheeks, a natural beige eyeshadow and lengthening mascara keep the look polished. Finish off with a topknot so as not to distract from your stunning natural beauty.

Beauty blog: Pop Art

Personally I am loving the colour blocking trend that has taken over S/S12; anything to brighten up the grey British summertime (seriously where is the sun hiding?) Why keep it just for your outfit though? Why not incorporate it into your make up as well?

Now I'm not saying that we should all be wandering around like Coco the clown but sometimes it is nice to shake it up a bit. So ditch the brown eyeshadow and pick up a turquoise or a purple instead. Slick on a fuchsia gloss, it is guaranteed to not only perk up your outfit but also your mood.

My long suffering friend and human barbie doll Albana agreed to try out the look. As a rule of thumb you should either emphasise  your eyes or lips; it is the beauty equivalent of choosing an outfit that shows either your legs or boobs! I chose a punchy pink pout for a dramatic yet young and fun look.

The bright pink 'pout paint' by Sleek (available at Superdrug) used on Albana's lips delivers a highly pigmented glossy lip with a tiny price tag to boot, perfect for a night out and a great alternative to classic red. A light sweep of turquoise eyeshadow provides an edgy contrast to the pink lips without being over the top. Keep the rest of your face natural and clash your pout with your outfit for a fashion forward approach to the trend.

For a truly catwalk inspired look clash your nail varnish as well by choosing an orange or peppermint green shade; this is definitely not for the wallflowers though as you will have no shortage of admiring stares.

Beauty blog: retro glamour

When it comes to beauty I love to experiment with different products and colours. (I am writing this post with electric blue nails and they are AWESOME.) Ever since I was a little girl I have been obsessed with make up, if there was green eyeshadow, red lipstick or glitter spray within a five mile radius I knew about it. Thankfully I have calmed down now but I still like to try out the new beauty trends in a slightly more muted way and can pick out the ones that really do not flatter me (orange lipstick anyone?) 

So I thought I would share with you within my blog; my favourite make up looks, beauty tips and new products that I have tried and here is my first, hope you enjoy!

One of the looks that I always return to is the old school glamorous Hollywood starlet; no matter how groggy you are in the morning, a slick of deep red lipstick and winged black eyeliner will instantly make you look like you have made an effort. A little dab of highlighter underneath perfectly shaped eyebrows will give the illusion of bigger eyes and of course don't forget the mascara. A neutral taupe eyeshadow and fuss free complexion lets your natural beauty shine through. It's as simple as that.

The best thing about this look is that it can be done in under five minutes and for girls on the go that is essential. The side swept tousled hair keeps it young and modern  whilst not looking too overdone. My gorgeous friend Albana let me try it out on her and I think it looks blooming lovely.

It's vintage darling

As part of my journalism degree I had to create my very own magazine, it was quite simply the best assignment EVER! Naturally I chose fashion and in particular Liverpool vintage shopping as the topic. My beautiful friend Kate agreed to model whilst I had my first taste of fashion photography, (once I had taken the lens cap off) styling and creative directing at two fantastic vintage shops; Preserved vintage and Raiders Vintage both on Renshaw street.

Vintage is such a great way to create a one off look and the great thing about these outfits are that they all cost between £30 -£40! What a bargain! 

The theme was chosen after one of my favourite books; Alice in Wonderland which was easy given the abundance of trinkets and treasures to find in the shops. 

Hope you enjoy!

Raiders vintage: This patterned silk shirt is a dead ringer for the current Zara collection and the nude shorts give the illusion of longer legs especially paired with beige boots. Couldn't resist the straw hat either; perfect festival attire.

Raiders vintage: Peach is a universally flattering shade especially for those blessed with a tan (unlike me.) This is a perfect day dress and I am rather partial to the backpack trend being a child of the 90's especially when they look this chic.

Raiders vintage: I absolutely fell in love with these boots as soon as I saw them and had they been in my size I would have definitely snapped them up, luckily they were Kate's. Denim shorts are a style staple in any girl's wardrobe and the sequined top makes it perfect for a night with the girls.

Preserved vintage: One of the big trends that has been on the fashion radar for a while now is sheer fabrics, for those who dare why not pair two sheer pieces together. The conservative styling of the shirt and skirt stop it from becoming a threat to public decency but keep it sultry. 

Preserved vintage: Spring/summer 2012 is all about the clashing prints and when it looks this good you can see why. The black top neutralises the super bright skirt making it easy to wear but still fun. This is the perfect ladylike outfit for lunch with the girls or a first date.

Poodle power

Of course my blog would not be complete without the subject of most of my photographs, my eleven year old poodle Mollie. Here she is pulling her best windswept look.

And so it begins.....

For around a year now I have been determined to set up a blog but every time I sit down to write something occurs to me; what do I have to say that other people would want to read? Yes I am your typical self deprecating, optimistic, easy going Brit, the thing is I want to be a fashion journalist. 

Let’s put it this way, when sorting out a monthly budget most people don’t include a magazine allowance and my boyfriend knows every Tuesday as ‘Look Magazine Day.’ It is fair to say that I am obsessed with writing and my favourite topic is fashion. Having studied journalism at university I now know the first rule of writing articles – find the people angle, so why should my blog be any different? (I owe it to my lecturers really!)

So I would love it if you would follow me on my journey up the ranks to working at a national fashion magazine, well that is the dream after all. I know you must wonder how I am so sure that it will happen for me; there are thousands of girls out there desperate to work at their favourite fashion magazine but as my mum will vouch for, I am as determined as a wasp trying to get out of a window, I’m not afraid to work my way up and I am not afraid of hard graft. To get where I want to be I will literally write about anything which so far has included; the lovely topic of sewage works, school fetes and grass cutting to name but a few.

What will you get from reading my blog because at the end of the day essentially I am selling my personality and interests to you, the reader? Fashion is my main passion; however cliche it sounds but music, beauty and travel are topics close to my heart as well. The main focus will be my quest to land that dream job, so expect tips and advice from internships and jobs that I do. As well as all this I will include anything that inspires me and maybe a few cheeky snaps of my outfits along the way. Oh and seriously how long does it take to find a blog name that hasn't been picked already!

Feel free to follow my twitter @abbiecoles